Where did I go wrong?

When you first find out you are expecting you are so over whelmed with joy, hopes and dreams. You go out and buy all the how to parent books and actually read them too. Once you have read all the books then you feel like you are ready for this new experience. I mean you have read everything how hard can raising a baby really be.

The big day comes and you realize you have no clue about what to do. You are sitting there holding this tiny little bundle of joy and thinking I really get to take this home with me!!! It starts to seem easy I mean the baby just lays there and you get to cuddle with him while people come and check on you. Wow this is great I don't know what all the fuss and stress was about.

Then you experience the first night home with your bundle of joy and you realize all that reading you did was a waste of time!!! It doesn't matter what the book said my child is still screaming. And the fact that I have had 2 hours of sleep is not helping me better understand what my sweet angel is screaming for. As my darling Max is laying in his crib I search through all the bags for the user manual. The hospital must of included it in the bag of goodies that they sent us home with. However, after searching through everything the user manual was nowhere to be found. And when you call to ask the hospital where they placed it the sound of the lady laughing and saying bless your heart does not help the situation at all. Then the sun comes up and you find yourself laying in bed watching this gift from God all cuddled up in your arms sleeping. At that moment all the stress of the hours before vanish and you thank God for all the moments that you have had and will have with this miracle.

Teething o what fun RIGHT??? At this stage I am remind of how little sleep i actually need to function. The feeling of being woken up by screams and cries in the middle of the night is the worse feeling a mother can ever experience. My sweet son is laying in bed crying because is mouth is hurting for no reason as far as he is concerned. I try and help ease the pain with meds but he still just whines. As a mommy I just want to kiss the boo boo and make him all better, but I can't. This goes on for a couple of months and my sweet Max is not enjoying himself. Just when we think this stage is over a new tooth starts to pop up. Then just like all the stressful moments before this one has come to an end and we start getting some sleep again.

Terrible 2's early please noooooo. Now we have entered into the stage where my sweet baby seems to vanish from time to time and we are visited by the not so sweet Max!!! It seems like the baby who once made me laugh with all his gassy giggles and silly tricks is now running around yelling NOOOOO and trying to kick the dog as hard as he can. And if that wasn't bad enough he has started using the most awful 4 letter word ever "MINE." Everything is MINE he tells us and he gets so upset if we take it from him. Don't get me wrong he is not awful all the time, but when he has his moments they are draining. My Mary Poppins bag is running low on tricks so I hope this stage is not long especially since he is not even 2 yet!!!

Terrible 2's continued. . . Now my son has turned into a bully. A couple of weeks ago the teacher sent a note home telling us that Max was pushing other kids and he had to go to time out for the first time ever. Well once I saw that note I sat Max down and we had a long talk about this. Here is what the conversation looked like . . .
Mommy - "Max did you push other kids at school?"
Max - "Push!"
Mommy - "Max tell mommy did you push people at school?"
Max - "Push Push!"
Mommy - "Max you can not push people down . . . no pushing."
Max - "No Push!"
Mommy - "Are you going to push people tomorrow at school?"
Max - (nods his head yes)
Mommy - "Max no pushing please."
Max - "No Push! Outside play?"

Of course after that conversation I felt like I really got through to my son which is why I was so shocked to get another note from the teachers. It looks like that intense conversation that Max and I had days before really did not have an impact on him. He actually stepped up his game and started pushing more people down which lead to him making multiple visits to time out. At this point I feel like maybe I didn't make myself clear the first time. So again I sat down with my sweet baby and we talked about how pushing is not OK. I explained to him that pushing is bad and that he needs to stop it RIGHT NOW. Then the 3rd note was sent home. Now I am on the computer researching military schools. My bundle of joy has turned into a hoodlum. I can see it now he will be sitting behind bars one day telling some reporter that his life could of been so much better if only his mom had taught him not to push others in MDO!!! I guess I better start shopping now for that perfect outfit to wear on the Jerry Springer show!!!